A Rant About Pop‐up Dinners

I‐ve had it with spontaneous dining experiences being inherently inacessible. Take this one, for example: CowByBear. Essentially, you spend $200 dollars a plate to have a pretentious furry serve you and 13 strangers an expensive meal in some rando’s house.

Now, I’ve never been to this event but I can fucking guarantee this shit is wildly inaccessible. How do I know this? Because the website states that you’ll be emailed the location of the dinner 24 hours before it is scheduled. That’s right, you have no fucking clue where you’re going to be spending your dollars until the day before the event. Need to arrange transportation? Tough shit. Worried that the event is going to be held in the split-level of some rich asshole in Magnolia? Fuck you, of course it is.

Are you thinking Well, I’ll just ask for a refund if they hold the event somewhere I can’t get into. Oh, in that case, get fucked because the website states:

quote: Much like attending a concert or sporting event, all sales are final. If you cannot come, we recommend you transfer your ticket to someone else… end quote
Someone in a Bear Suit

But don’t worry, the FAQ goes out of it’s way to let you know they’ll do their best to accommodate vegetarians (Kale By Bear?) and allergies if they’re given enough advanced notice.

Yes, this entire thing is based on conjecture. But I’m right. Fuck, if I’m wrong, I’ll show up to this fucking thing in an I Love Bears shirt and personally apologize in between bites of aged beef. I’ll put my money where my mouth is.

I’m sick of shit like this. I’m sick of amazing experiences being so meticulously planned that you can’t offer refunds while at the same time being so short‐sighted that they can’t provide accessibility information.

Honestly, I’d give this place half a point if they would just be honest and put We’re bear‐y sorry, but we can’t guarantee that our dining locations are accessible. Womp Womp somewhere on the site.